FlipitTypes TV - Recaps, Gossip, and Trash Talk

I was psyched for tonight’s episode of Veronica Mars because it was a Veronica goes to jail storyline and I have always been fascinated by women on the inside. I like how they buzz their hair and hold cigarette packs in their rolled up sleeves and girl-rape each other. Unfortunately, this is the NEW CW and not HBO, so there was no bitch slapping or dyke drama. There is also no room in the show’s budget to hire a cellmate for Vero, so she’s stuck alone with Sheriff Workout, Barney Fife, and a cute jailhouse hairdo. < >< >
There was lot to get to tonight, and the writers rocked it out. Did Coach Barry’s son kill him? Did Dean O’Begley’s son kill him? (If I was a parent, this episode would have had me seriously worried.) Will Veronica finally forgive the guy we all know she’s gonna end up with? And why isn’t Logan pouting?

Last week’s episode of Veronica Mars ended with a teaser of Veronica saying “I’m pregnant!” I’ve thought of nothing but abortion all week long. Thanks, Veronica Mars. Teen pregnancy happens. I get it. I wouldn’t be here without it. But please don’t let it happen to my girl! I know I should have faith, but I’ve been burned before. Is this gonna be like when Facts Of Life turned the girls’ house into a candy store with no Mrs. G? I can’t take it! Finally, Tuesday night arrives. Tivo, you can have the night off. Don’t get all mopey on me, you’re looking haggard. Rest up. No, wait, sorry I need you again. I have to go to 7-11 for some ice cream. If Veronica gets pregnant, I’ll get fatter. I’m loyal like that.

I was so excited for the return of Veronica Mars that I watched the episode LIVE. My Tivo was hurt, but sometimes you have to hurt those you love to get what you need. I learned that lesson when my best friend Brent joined AA. I hope my Tivo forgives me sooner than I forgave Brent. Traitor.

At the end of the last arc, Vero caught the tag-team Fantastic Sam’s rapists, but that was about the only piece of good news around Neptune. Daddy Keith had to break up with Harmony, which was like watching Just Shoot Me get cancelled all over again. Vero got dumped by Logan, and Mac’s libido was suffering from Beaver depression. It’s starting to look like Mack will follow in the footsteps of my sweet, spinster Great Aunt LuLu. I am sure there are worse fates than playing Go Fish and wandering the aisles of Big Lots alone forever, but I can’t think of any right now. Did I mention I’m single? And of course the most heart wrenching news of all was in the Neptune Press’s obit section. Dean Begley-O’Dell died of a (self-inflicted?) bullet to the head. Why God, why? He saved so many lives on St. Elsewhere, he just didn’t deserve this. Damn you, ruthless Veronica Mars! Stop killing my loved ones! Brent! I need you!