Trash Talk: Angelina’s Crossed the Line
Angelina Jolie’s crossed the line with the press. What now? Did she show up to another interview with a vial of hick blood around her neck or obviously shoot up before a meeting? Did she steal David Arquette from Courtney Cox or call one of her kids a racist slur? Nope. She asked for privacy. BITCH!!!
It’s time to make publicity rounds for her upcoming movie about a really curly wigged woman with a questionable accent…er, I mean, Daniel Pearl’s beheading, but before she begins, Ho-lie wants to make sure no one’s gonna talk shit about her that she doesn’t approve of. The Smoking Gun printed a two page contract that Ho-lie wants all members of the press to sign before she talks. There are 3 basic rules: No inquiries into her “personal relationships”. For example, no questions like “Do you feel guilty that your husband is stolen goods?” or “How much did you pay for that baby?” “Does Brad have chicken legs, or do they just look small in pictures?” is definitely out. BOOOOO, Ho-lie.
Second, the interview is only allowed to promote the movie. Footage is not to be used for gossip pieces about her “personal relationships” (Does Brad have a big one?). Furthermore, no smirking and finger pointing, and teenage boys are banned from jerking off to any image produced in said interview.
Third, no parts of the interview can be used to make fun of Jolie in any way, shape or form. Sorry, but if you don’t think we’re gonna ask you about your poor kid addiction, you’re nuts. Lighten up, lady. The following disparaging interview with Jessica St. Clair from ThisJustIn is one of the most entertaining you’ve ever given:
Reactions to the contract have been pretty intense. Drudge immediately posted four stories making fun of her (Has excessive exercize made that bulging vein on her forehead pop out more?), but it was the righteous brothers over at FOX News who were most peeved at being banned from the red carpet of her premier. I was thrilled when I heard this, but then found out that all press was banned. Even Access Hollywood! Silencing people is fun but only if they’re people I don’t want to hear from. You’re squashing Nancy O’Dell? Now you’re just being ridonkulus, Angie.
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How dare anyone look at her, or ask a personal question! I heard Mother Theresa had a similar contract for the press to sign. Maybe that’s were she go it from. Meanwhile, how skinny is that bitch going to get? You can see every vertebre in her spine. Gross.
I’m sorry, but if you want your privacy there’s two vital things you shouldn’t do:
1-Become an actress
2-Act like a freak/media whore
That is all.